Difference between revisions of "User:Gamekid/Nanoha"

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"'''{{ytmnd|nanoha|Barack Obama watches Hentai}}'''" is a YTMND by [[User:Gamekid|me]] based on {{ytmnduser|bigmac2112}}'s "{{ytmnd|grapefruit|Chris Tucker watches Hentai}}".  It was the 258th site on my list at the time.
 
"'''{{ytmnd|nanoha|Barack Obama watches Hentai}}'''" is a YTMND by [[User:Gamekid|me]] based on {{ytmnduser|bigmac2112}}'s "{{ytmnd|grapefruit|Chris Tucker watches Hentai}}".  It was the 258th site on my list at the time.
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 +
==Plot==
 +
While [[w:Barack Obama|Obama]]'s presidential win is widely regarded as a legendary coup for blacks and [http://www.slashfilm.com/2009/06/20/votd-john-hodgman-asks-is-obama-the-first-modern-nerd-president/ comic book nerds], it was only recently that his comic obsession gave way to watching [[w:Hentai|animated pornography in the style of Japanese manga]].  After borrowing the [[w:Semen|seminal]] DVD ''Hentai'' from Chris Tucker, Obama checks the Chapter List in the case and fast-forwards to its <s>[[w:Nanoha Takamachi|Nanoha]]</s>Cutie Honey scene sixty-one percent through. Epic ensues, for once Obama reaches the fateful chapter he proclaims "'''Our time for change has come!'''" so loudly that he begins to resemble [[w:Bill Clinton|the nation's first black president]] and almost everyone in his neighborhood visits to watch as well.  (Chris Tucker, curiously, does not join.)  In comes [[w:Where's the beef?|Clara Peller]], who shouts "Hey, where's the beef?" when she notices Honey's lack of [[w:Vagina|features]].  [[w:Ludacris|Ludacris]], famous for his [[w:Area Codes (song)|modesty and restrained use of vulgarity]], gives an equally modest comment about her bare breasts.  Chad Warden, always crazy over [[w:PlayStation 3|the PS Triple]] and women, rubs his spiky hair all over Obama's TV screen as Honey's hair flows.  Tucker is quickly spared from the resulting scratchy noise.
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 +
Honey's magic farting army of [[w:Kermit the Frog|Kermits]] appears throughout the scene to do magic, fart, and act like an army of Kermits.  After they have fully removed her clothes (with magic), <s>pioneering anime character [[w:New Cutie Honey|Cutie Honey]]</s>unemployed stripper Saler Mune jumps in front of the camera and yells ear-splitting nonsense to avoid reliving bad memories.  The scene itself is tame, but metaphorical: Honey kisses a [[w:Testicle|magic ball]] and launches it away (while [[w:Joe Buck|Joe Buck]] hangs a printed Google Images search result for "baseball" from a clear string in front of it and makes a self-deprecating play call), and a metallic arc and [[w:Penis|staff]] assemble around it.  The Juggernaut ('''bitch''') and Vince "'''THAT'S GOTTA HURT'''" McMahon celebrate, while [[w:Carson Kressley|that guy from ''Queer Eye'']] falls over in shock at the staff's length.  The ball starts ''talking'': <s>[[w:David Herman|Michael Bolton]]</s>[[w:Dwayne Johnson|The Rock]] is understandably confused, but [http://www.youtube.com/user/SAILORMOONRED SAILORMOONRED] quickly explains and The Rock asks no further.
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[[w:Alex Jones (radio host)|Alex Jones]] becomes the ultimate foe in the story, when he sees Michael Jordan's sudden guest appearance as Cutie Honey's sidekick and Jordan assigns her a challenging basketball shot as she gains new epic clothes.  Jones thinks Jordan was daring ''him'' and conspiring to sideline him with a sports-related injury, and refuses to attempt it.  He tries to enter Honey's animated world by [[w:Don't Try This at Home|jumping into the television]], but is repelled by her equally epic hair. After Buck makes a lame baseball score pun, he somehow makes it through and tries to grab Honey's staff, but is subdued and reduced to a glowing blue noise-blob by her and her Kermit army.  Brian Williams looks on from his office at Mainstream Media—from which he [[w:Emperor of Japan|rules Japan]] and designs hentai [[w:Media franchise|tie-in merchandise]]—and reveals his mysterious true form, Nicer-Haired Chad Warden.  The cliffhanger compels anyone who is still reading this section to [[upvoter|vote 5]].
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==Development==
 +
The site took roughly three days to create.  Snapshots of the [[#source-nanoha|source video]] were taken with [[w:Media Player Classic|Media Player Classic]] with [[w:ffdshow|ffdshow]]; its sound was extracted with [[w:VLC media player|VLC media player]].  Images were edited with [[w:GIMP|GIMP]] 2.6.6 and sound was mixed in [[w:Audacity|Audacity]] 1.3.8.  After submission, I decided to watch it to celebrate, and soon got my first [[w:Windows Vista editions#64 bit versions|bluescreen]] in over eight months; recovery was quick.
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Two other features were planned: a small dialogue in which a character would say that Nanoha's a virgin and [[w:New Cutie Honey|Cutie Honey]] would say her "Ah, but I ''did'' hit it" dub line from episode 2; and the text "(lol, owned)" shown as Honey's face hovers over Nanoha's naked body.  Neither were or will be added.
  
 
==Sources==
 
==Sources==
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|  <span id="source-nanoha">Background</span>
 
|  <span id="source-nanoha">Background</span>
 
|  1–64
 
|  1–64
|  [[w:Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Strikers|Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS]] (Seven Arcs), via [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8c_Voj5Gv0 YouTube].
+
Bonus scene on [[w:Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha Strikers|Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS]] [http://www.nanoha.com/archive3/goods/dvd9.html Vol. 9] (Seven Arcs), via [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8c_Voj5Gv0 YouTube] (where a download link is posted).
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  First black president
 
|  First black president
Line 113: Line 125:
 
|  "Like my hair?"
 
|  "Like my hair?"
 
|  13 et al.
 
|  13 et al.
|  ''See [[#source-chad|Images]]''
+
|  ''See [[#source-chad|Images]]''.
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  "WHAT?"
 
|  "WHAT?"
 
|  4 et al.
 
|  4 et al.
|  ''See [[#source-kermit|Images]]''
+
|  ''See [[#source-kermit|Images]]''.
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  "Where's the beef?"
 
|  "Where's the beef?"
 
|  8–9
 
|  8–9
|  ''See [[#source-beef|Images]]''
+
|  ''See [[#source-beef|Images]]''.
 +
|-
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|  Ludacris
 +
|  11
 +
|  [http://music.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=music.artistalbums&artistid=1845808&albumid=13586 ''Back For The First Time'' album by Ludacris on MySpace Music].
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  Bing!
 
|  Bing!
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|  [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fnb_tMRlHwQ#t=0m24s YouTube].
 
|  [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fnb_tMRlHwQ#t=0m24s YouTube].
 
|-
 
|-
|  <s>Honeeeee...</s><span style="font-size: x-large;">'''THE VOICE OF JESUS'''</span>
+
|  <s>"Honeeeee..."</s><span style="font-size: x-large;">'''THE VOICE OF JESUS'''</span>
 
|  19–20
 
|  19–20
|  ''See [[#source-honey|Images]]'' (episode 4)
+
|  ''See [[#source-honey|Images]]'' (episode 4).
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  "Back, at the track ..."
 
|  "Back, at the track ..."
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|  Juggernaut
 
|  Juggernaut
 
|  28–29
 
|  28–29
|  ''See [[#source-jug|Images]]''
+
|  ''See [[#source-jug|Images]]''.
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  Pretty cake
 
|  Pretty cake
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|  "In the name of the moon ..."
 
|  "In the name of the moon ..."
 
|  38–40
 
|  38–40
''See [[#source-moon|Images]]''
+
|  [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQoV5ZYtdfc SAILOR SOLDIERS].
 
|-
 
|-
 
|  "She's a ..."
 
|  "She's a ..."

Latest revision as of 09:51, August 10, 2009

"Barack Obama watches Hentai" is a YTMND by me based on bigmac2112's "Chris Tucker watches Hentai". It was the 258th site on my list at the time.

Plot

While Obama's presidential win is widely regarded as a legendary coup for blacks and comic book nerds, it was only recently that his comic obsession gave way to watching animated pornography in the style of Japanese manga. After borrowing the seminal DVD Hentai from Chris Tucker, Obama checks the Chapter List in the case and fast-forwards to its NanohaCutie Honey scene sixty-one percent through. Epic ensues, for once Obama reaches the fateful chapter he proclaims "Our time for change has come!" so loudly that he begins to resemble the nation's first black president and almost everyone in his neighborhood visits to watch as well. (Chris Tucker, curiously, does not join.) In comes Clara Peller, who shouts "Hey, where's the beef?" when she notices Honey's lack of features. Ludacris, famous for his modesty and restrained use of vulgarity, gives an equally modest comment about her bare breasts. Chad Warden, always crazy over the PS Triple and women, rubs his spiky hair all over Obama's TV screen as Honey's hair flows. Tucker is quickly spared from the resulting scratchy noise.

Honey's magic farting army of Kermits appears throughout the scene to do magic, fart, and act like an army of Kermits. After they have fully removed her clothes (with magic), pioneering anime character Cutie Honeyunemployed stripper Saler Mune jumps in front of the camera and yells ear-splitting nonsense to avoid reliving bad memories. The scene itself is tame, but metaphorical: Honey kisses a magic ball and launches it away (while Joe Buck hangs a printed Google Images search result for "baseball" from a clear string in front of it and makes a self-deprecating play call), and a metallic arc and staff assemble around it. The Juggernaut (bitch) and Vince "THAT'S GOTTA HURT" McMahon celebrate, while that guy from Queer Eye falls over in shock at the staff's length. The ball starts talking: Michael BoltonThe Rock is understandably confused, but SAILORMOONRED quickly explains and The Rock asks no further.

Alex Jones becomes the ultimate foe in the story, when he sees Michael Jordan's sudden guest appearance as Cutie Honey's sidekick and Jordan assigns her a challenging basketball shot as she gains new epic clothes. Jones thinks Jordan was daring him and conspiring to sideline him with a sports-related injury, and refuses to attempt it. He tries to enter Honey's animated world by jumping into the television, but is repelled by her equally epic hair. After Buck makes a lame baseball score pun, he somehow makes it through and tries to grab Honey's staff, but is subdued and reduced to a glowing blue noise-blob by her and her Kermit army. Brian Williams looks on from his office at Mainstream Media—from which he rules Japan and designs hentai tie-in merchandise—and reveals his mysterious true form, Nicer-Haired Chad Warden. The cliffhanger compels anyone who is still reading this section to vote 5.

Development

The site took roughly three days to create. Snapshots of the source video were taken with Media Player Classic with ffdshow; its sound was extracted with VLC media player. Images were edited with GIMP 2.6.6 and sound was mixed in Audacity 1.3.8. After submission, I decided to watch it to celebrate, and soon got my first bluescreen in over eight months; recovery was quick.

Two other features were planned: a small dialogue in which a character would say that Nanoha's a virgin and Cutie Honey would say her "Ah, but I did hit it" dub line from episode 2; and the text "(lol, owned)" shown as Honey's face hovers over Nanoha's naked body. Neither were or will be added.

Sources

Frame numbers assume sync is used to view the site.
Images
Image Frames Creators, owners, and sources
Background 1–64 Bonus scene on Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha StrikerS Vol. 9 (Seven Arcs), via YouTube (where a download link is posted).
First black president 2–3 Bob McNeely, The White House. Via Wikipedia File:Bill Clinton.jpg.
Kermit 4 et al. Via Chris Tucker watches Hentai.
"Where's the beef?" lady 8 Joe Sedelmaier et al. for Wendy's. Via YouTube.
Ludacris 11 © Glenn Francis, www.PacificProDigital.com. Via Wikipedia File:Ludacris 2008.jpg.
CHAD DADDY 13–14, last Via YouTube.
Yahoo! 17 Google, of course.
Cutie HoneyTHE FACE OF JESUS 19–20 The greatest fictional work ever created by modern man, episode 3.
Baseball thumbnail 21–24 Google Images 'baseball' search, result 9.
The Juggernaut (bitch) 28–29 My Way Entertainment's "THE JUGGERNAUT BITCH!!". Via YouTube.
Stephanie 31–32 Via Blog That Mommy!.
Trump 32 Via Zimbio.
Vince "THAT'S GOTTA HURT" McMahon 33 Via Top Socialite.
Carson Kressley 34 Phil Guest. Via Wikipedia File:CarsonKressley.jpg.
The Rock 37 Via milk was a bad choice....
SAILORMOONRED with Paul Bearer and Sailor Moon 38–40 PAUL BEARER ON THE SAILOR MOON SHOW on (surprise) YouTube.
Little Willy from Philly 44–46 Will Smith on Vibe.
Jordan, Mr. T, and Doug 47–54 Via Obama watches Sailor Moon with Michael Jordan.
Alex Jones 55 et al. Via Alex Jones AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Joe Buck 58 Monowi. Wikipedia File:Joe Buck.jpg.
Brian Williams Second-last David Shankbone. Via Wikipedia File:Brian Williams Tribeca 2009.jpg.
Sounds
Sound During frames Creators, owners, and sources
Nanoha's theme 1–64 See Images.
Obama 2–4 Iowa Caucus Victory Speech on YouTube.
"Like my hair?" 13 et al. See Images.
"WHAT?" 4 et al. See Images.
"Where's the beef?" 8–9 See Images.
Ludacris 11 Back For The First Time album by Ludacris on MySpace Music.
Bing! 17 YouTube.
"Honeeeee..."THE VOICE OF JESUS 19–20 See Images (episode 4).
"Back, at the track ..." 21–24, 58 MLB.com (see link "1996 World Series Film", 41:00). Was surprisingly hard to find; I remembered very well watching it.
Juggernaut 28–29 See Images.
Pretty cake 31–32 Via prettycake.
"You're fired." 32 Via YouTube.
"THAT'S GOTTA HURT" 33 WWF: Wrestlemania (SNES). Via YouTube.
"Ow-how!" 34 Narcis Prince. Again, YouTube.
"The f*ck does that mean?" 37 Office Space. Take a guess.
"In the name of the moon ..." 38–40 SAILOR SOLDIERS.
"She's a ..." 44–46 Via Wild Wild West Wavs at Bubby's Wav Archive.
"... nothing but net." 47–54 McDonald's. Via YouTube.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" 55 et al. Via Alex Jones AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
440Hz sawtooth wave Third-last Made with Audacity.
Brian Williams Second-last NBC Nightly News. Via msnbc.com.